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Review – Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

Thumbs up or thumbs down? Simple, spoiler free reviews.

Things get worse for a down-on-his-luck Capt. Jack Sparrow when his old nemesis, the evil Capt. Salazar, escapes from the Devil’s Triangle. Jack’s only hope of survival lies in seeking out the legendary Trident of Poseidon…

Apparently I’m a glutton for punishment because I keep going to see these massive pieces of trash. Some how they just keep getting worse…and to be honest that’s saying something because they’ve been utter rubbish for 4 films now. Which is a massive, massive shame because when it first came out the original Pirates of the Caribbean was probably my favourite movie as a kid.

I still can’t get my head around the fact that producers, script writers and directors have completely missed the point on what made the first film so brilliant. They’ve taken the ‘curse of the black pearl’ and decided that the reason fans liked a pirate film was the magic element. It couldn’t possibly be the fact that a fun, swash-buckling romp is just…well fun? Instead, every film since they’ve doubled down on the whole magic nonsense and quite frankly its just a little bit pants.

Not only that, the franchise quickly went from exciting action set pieces to completely over-the-top, bizarre and down right implausible moments. Now I know that you’re meant to have some level of suspension of disbelief (and in a film about magic you probably should) but it’s just dumb. Continue reading

How Not To Adventure (Episode 2): The Rat Cupboard

Three months ago the township of Durgon’s Rest exiled Elia Fenfrost for practicing witchcraft. But now as the first harvest approaches the crops are failing, local farm animals are becoming sick with disease, and all of the food stores have gone foul.

The town’s folk suspect that the accursed blight is the work of Elia – exacting her revenge for casting her out into the wild. Our three brave, yet incredibly stupid, ‘heroes’ are the villages last hope, but can they find Elia and end the curse before its too late?

Probably not.

Players:
Dungeon Master – Doug
Dalton Sebastian Belvedere Grey – Rob
Jibblewick – Josh
Skaram – Chris

The majority of this campaign is based on the Dungeons and Dragons story ‘The Witchfire Curse’ from The Brinoceros, check it out! Other stories used are ‘Deepwood Memorial’ and ‘Workshop of the Mad Alchemist’.

Review – Busted: Night Driver

Is Busted’s new album a thumbs up or a thumbs down?

If you’d have told me back in 2005 that Busted’s next album would be released in 2016 and that it would have a completely different style and is actually fantastic. My first question would be ‘who are you and how do you know the future?’. My second thought would be that, you’re a bloody liar.

As we all know Charlie went off to focus on Fightstar full-time and he refused to ever consider returning to Busted. Yet here I am, listening to an album that completely slipped under my radar and it is actually brilliant.

That’s right, gone is the pop punk rock sound of the early 2000’s. Now more ‘Air Hostess’, ‘Year 3000’ or ‘That’s What I Go To School For’ to be found here. Instead we’ve got synthpop, new wave and indie pop vibes. I think it’s really good. It’s a big risk though, returning after over a decade in hiatus to do so with a completely new sound. Here, it works though. The songs are just as catchy as they used to be as well.

Also, there’s several saxophone solos to be found. Do I really need to say anymore?

The thing is, Busted have grown up and it wouldn’t really make sense for them to try to recreate their old sound. This new sound is what’s left after you get rid of all the juvenile pop punk from their original run and instead what you’re left with is a really solid musical group who are finding a new something and not afraid to take a huge leap to do so.

While it might not have been as successful as either of their previous records it certainly deserves recognition. The problem is that the trio are effectively a brand new band under the same name. A name that has a lot of sentimentality and history with its fans and some of them won’t want this new sound. It’s likely to create a divide between fans of the old and fans of the new, with people like me balancing in the middle.

That’s life I guess, at the end of the day this is a great album and I highly recommend it.

Verdict: Thumbs Up

Review: Fast and Furious 8

Thumbs up or thumbs down? Simple, spoiler free reviews.

8fbd1362-8e2f-480a-be55-e8ee48eee897Eight. Eight Fast and Furious films. Who would have thought it?

Fast and Furious 8 or The Fate of The Furious depending on your region is quite possibly the best of the entire series. Certainly since it entered its ‘completely over the top, ridiculous, mind numbing at times’ incarnation. Basically, it is the best film since The Rock joined the cast. And that is not a slate on Dwayne Johnson, since joining he has been one of the best parts of the franchise.

This films is very funny at times and infuriating at others. So standard Fast and furious fodder really. I will say this, in the previous two films I thought the balance of ‘really cool’ moments and ‘oh God that is so unbelievable I want to rip my own eyes out’ moments was balanced in the wrong direction. In Fast 8 however, I think they get it right. The stupid, logic and physics breaking moments are still there are fewer in number but still are really dumb. However, it is what the series is known for now so you just have to accept it.

This film also contains perhaps the greatest scene in the history of the franchise too. Jason Statham, single-handedly fighting his way through an entire plane of mercenaries, whilst carrying a baby. It is both hilarious and utterly bad ass.

Jason Statham and Dwayne Johnson are by far the best part of the film. Their relationship is brilliant. Continuing from Furious 7 they absolutely hate each other and trash talk each other every step of the way.

The addition of ‘new Paul Walker guy’ however was rather awkward. Perhaps they should have waited another film or two before replacing him. I have nothing against Scott Eastward’s performance I just think the character, so obviously being lined up as the replacement in future films is a little insensitive. Yet mostly it is unnecessary as The Fast and Furious cast is now so large that, what with The Rock and Jason Statham as well as countless other returning characters, they could have just let it be.

Overall, I found this latest film from the franchise to be very enjoyable. As long as they can reign in the utterly nonsensical nonsense (and just stick with mildly nonsensical nonsense) I can see this franchise continuing to go from strength to strength. If you’re an existing fan of the series you will love this film and due to it not being quite so frustratingly daft as previous iterations, this might entice newer viewers to stick around for the next one too.

Verdict: Thumbs Up

Review: Wrestlemania 33

Wrestlemania has come and gone once again. Thankfully, 33 will be looked back upon far more fondly than 32. I thought it was an above average show with a few awesome moments as well as a few sad ones.

The Undertaker had his final match and has retired. The ‘big dog’ took control of ‘the yard’. Brock Lesnar and Goldberg had a perfect storm. Bray Wyatt lost yet another Wrestlemania match…oh, and The Hardys showed up!

If you were putting the two shows head to head at ‘Mania, then Raw obviously won at the big event. They had the main event, the Universal Title went on after the WWE Title, the US and Tag Team Titles were defended on the main show. Mean while on Smackdown, their biggest feud opened the show. The Intercontinental was dropped to the pre-show, the Women got 5 minutes filler between main events and the Tag Titles didn’t make any sort of appearance!

Let’s get to it!

Pre-Show

Neville vs. Austin Aries

002_preshow_04022017ls_0198-83a03b28797ef36fe384725ae2323419Pretty good way to kick off the show I must say. While I’m sad that they aren’t considered important enough to be on the main show, being on the pre-show was probably the best thing that could have happened. Neville and Aries had a 15 minute match, which no doubt would have been 5 minutes had it been higher on the card.

Excellent closing sequence with Neville escaping the ‘Last Chancery’ and hitting the ‘Red Arrow to retain his title. However the entire match was enjoyable. Neville and Aries are two men who you can build an entire division around if given time, so this was pleasing to see.

Andre The Giant Battle Royal

Mojo. Rawley. Mojo? Mojo?! MOJO?!?! That’s just dumb.

I don’t know, or care, who the guy who got involved on Mojo’s behalf was but I did find it hilarious when a security guard stormed over and stopped him getting in the ring. Only for the referees to quietly shuffle her out of the way so he could do his spot. Give that woman a raise, everyone else was sleeping on the job. Or you know, brief the staff about someone coming in from the crowd?

In a match with Braun Strowman, Sami Zayn, even Big Show. Mojo Rawley seems like one of the worst choices possible. Still, at least it wasn’t Mojo R….oh for fu-

Dean Ambrose vs. Baron Corbin

20170313_wm33_ambrosebaron-5ad2d03480323c68c0395fc1b904bcf1I suppose the reaction they got from the crowd for the ‘pre-show main event’ explains why they were bumped down to the pre-show. No one cared.

I wonder if that’s because like me, they find Dean Ambrose incredibly dull and irritating or Baron Corbin a little uninspiring. Still, Ambrose retained and that’s pretty much all I have to say on the matter.

Thoughts about Smackdown [11/02/16]

Chris Jericho Vs AJ Style 2

Chris Jericho opens the show with a promo in which is flip flops between face and heel every other sentence. It’s a little weird, but hopefully its all just a slow burn for a Wrestlemania season heel run. He calls out AJ Styles to fight then and there!

006_sd_02092016jg_0215-2370905439You’re first thoughts are: Why is this the opening match?! That doesn’t make any sense! Oh, it’s so the Social Outcasts can interrupt and the match can be switched to a tag team match instead, with Jericho and AJ working as a team. It’s just like last week when the main event talent open and close the show doing double duty. It’s really weird that WWE don’t have enough talent on Smackdown to fill all of the matches without people having to wrestle twice. Or is that just me?

Continue reading

More Royal Rumble Predictions

 

jyqkrtlI’ve already done my more in depth match predictions for the 2016 Royal Rumble PPV (if you want to read that CLICK HERE) but I thought it would be fun just to do a round of quick fire predictions for the rest of the night, specifically within the Rumble match itself.

Who is going to walk away with a Championship? Who will get the most eliminations? Will Triple H win the World Title? No. Or, I hope not at least!

Here we go, quick fire 2016 Royal Rumble predictions!

Intercontinental Championship

Winner: Dean Ambrose


Tag Team Championship

Winners: The New Day


US Championship

Winner: Alberto Del Rio


Divas Championship

Winner: Charlotte


20150330_raw_brockheyman_2-1428062758Royal Rumble Match

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Winning  Entry Number: 22

Most Eliminations: Bray Wyatt

Final Four: Brock Lesnar, Roman Reigns, Sheamus & Bray Wyatt

bo-dallas-winLast Survivor from the League of Nations: Sheamus

Last Survivor from the Social Outcast: Bo Dallas

Last Survivor from The Wyatt Family: Bray Wyatt